I want to tread lightly here.

Somehow, we've been led to believe that trauma only happens when it's associated with the military and/or war. And indeed, it does.

But that's not the only time or way trauma occurs.

It happens when you have been violated; when you lose the security of your self due to invasion. In the aftermath, you can't shake the barrage of self-blame and guilt.


Seemingly, you hold the misguided belief that it's your fault

It shows up when you are or have lived in a chaotic environment.

It shows up when you've suffered or are grieving a loss.

It shows up when your stress has become so insurmountable that you don't know if you're coming or going. Your body aches. Your thinking is foggy. You can't seem to make a decision.

At it's most basic level, trauma presents itself when you experience something distressing and overwhelming, and you don't have the capacity to work through it so it becomes stuck in your mind and body.

It shows up whenever it wants, however it wants.

You find yourself in fits of anger or rage and sometimes it's uncontrollable.

Yet at the same time, you feel numb or have difficulty determining what is real and what is not.

Sometimes you resort to self-destructive behaviors.

I'm not judging you. In some way, it is your best attempt to manage the inner turmoil.

You don't have to be in the military to experience distress and be in a war.

Many young adult women struggle in the silent war within their home, workplace, church and/or community.  

 It is possible for you to experience peace.

Together, we can strategize so you can overcome the war - in your mind; in your body; in your soul.

Your desire to stand strong, look at your life's story, and say, "I've won. I've overcome," can be more than just a dream or desire. It can be your reality.

“You either walk inside your story and own it or you stand outside your story and hustle for your worthiness.” Brene Brown

Whatever winning looks like for you, know you are worth it. Whatever overcoming looks and feels likes for you, I will support you in your journey and use tools specifically designed to address trauma, like Brainspotting and EMDR.

Click here to find out more about EMDR, and here for Brainspotting.

    © 2019

    Butterfly Effect Counseling & Consultation Center

    Shelly Bates, M.A., LPC

    EMDR Trained

    Brainspotting (BSP) Practitioner

    Mindfulness Coach

    1750 N Collins Blvd

    Suite 206-C

    Richardson, Texas 75080

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